Deadline Diaries

Five Romance writers tell all.

Tuesday, September 26, 2006

Me and the Boys

Posted by Christine

Let me tell you how it is with me. I live, alone, in a world of men.

Not a lot of men. There’s my husband, Hunky Mensa Man and our younger son, the J. There used to be our older son, Matt, as well. But as sons will do, Matt grew up and got married and now lives happily in Oregon with his bride, Jenny.

Even the cats, Tom and Ed, are male—well, yes, there was that little snip-snip thing that went on back when they were only kittens. But they’re still guys in their hearts and in their guy-cat perspectives. Trust me on that.

When you live in a world of men, there are certain…issues you’re likely to face. It’s all workable. One learns to survive—even thrive. I have. But there are certain challenges, certain battles you will always be fighting, certain differences in approach and perspective between you and the guys that you’re probably never going to totally get past.

Take the whole grooming issue. Trying to get pretty is…just not pretty, folks. When you live with a houseful of males—at least, my houseful of males—they can’t understand why you need to take so long in the bathroom primping and painting before you’ll leave the house. They tell you things like how beautiful you look without makeup. They even think they believe it. Hah. Well, okay, maybe the cats don’t care how I look. Maybe…

And then, well, what about my chick flicks, huh? I have a definite dearth of chick flicks in my life. I mean, there’s only so much time around here for movie-watching. And there must be compromise. Lucky thing I like Quentin Tarantino and Oliver Stone movies almost as much as I yearn to watch Stepmom and Failure to Launch. Now, I have noticed that certain chick flicks can be slid by even Hunky Mensa Man. If they’re really smart and funny. Anything Nora Ephron wrote, for instance. If Nora Ephron wrote it, we sometimes even watch it twice. But forget Hugh Grant movies. If it’s got Hugh Grant in it, HMM becomes very impatient. And he’s sworn to me that he will not watch another remake of Pride and Prejudice. I nod and promise, “Never again, honey. Never.” Mwahaha.

Am I complaining too much? Oh, probably. I must admit there’s something about the whole upper body strength thing men have that comes in trés handy at times. As well as a certain…fearlessness. HMM and the J are never so happy as when you give them a sledgehammer and tell them it’s time to bust through a wall. They do enjoy their power tools, as well. And they know how to use them. HMM is amazing at home improvement. He can bust that wall, install new sheetrock, texture it and then paint it—without taping it off first. We have some brickwork issues on the front of our house. He’s dealing with that himself, smiling all the while. “Hmm. Never done masonry before. This could interesting…”

I think I’ll stop now—not that I couldn’t go on for another ten pages. Overall, I do love my guys. They’re the best.

Got a good guy story? And I am so not discriminating here. A good gal story will do just as well.


At 9:02 AM, Blogger Susan Mallery said...

I'm so with you on the guy thing... It's why I only want girl pets. Not counting Jake, my cat, who is kinda girly.

But even with all their annoying characteristics, men are great to have around. This weekend the magic ice making refrigerator hit a snag. No ice!! And I'd just gotten used to having ice on demand.

I went upstairs and did my best to look pitiful. The DH went down and had it fixed in about 2 minutes! (Apparently a stuck cube was the problem!)

And he keeps my car washed and never, ever complains when I call him at work and say I'm too tired/crabby/whatever to cook, can we go out for dinner?

We, too, have movie issues, but he will watch Hugh Grant. He draws the line at cartoons.

So even when he makes me crazy, I still want to keep him around.

At 9:29 AM, Blogger Maureen Child said...

Basically yeah, they are really good to have DH makes me crazy a lot of the time, but the man can fix anything! Really is amazing. And he still makes me laugh like nobody else.

On the primping issue though... my son used to take WAY more time doing his hair than my daughter and I put together!!!

At 10:48 AM, Blogger Christine Rimmer said...

Susan, I do love a man who's ready to go out to dinner.

And Maureen, re the primping thing--what? Could it be just moi? Oh, no way... ;)

At 10:57 AM, Anonymous Kim said...

Ok, I can totally relate to the all boy thing. I live in a house of mostly testosterone. My dog and I are the only girls...Its great most of the time, they are great about killing bugs and such, but they aren't much on shoe shopping.

My DH isn't a born handy man, but he is learning..:) He fixes our ancient clothes dryer on a regular basis...which makes me really happy be/c I hate to wear wet clothes.

One thing I will have in my next house is my own bathroom. One that they are all banned from entering.

The whole peeing in the vicinity of the toilet is really annoying.

(Good grief, its a big target...)

I tried telling them that I wasnt' going to clean the bathroom anymore--but that only worked until I assumed that the HASMAT team was going to knock on the door.

The youngest is only 3--so I am not holding out a lot of hope on the whole pee free bathroom floor anytime soon.

Oh well...

At 11:56 AM, Blogger Maureen Child said...

LOL Kim!! You're so right! WHY can't they hit a target?? A friend of mine, when her three sons were little, had a sign above the toilet that read,

Which I thought was too cute, but hell....the old bulls could use a little sharpshooting skill, too!

At 12:23 PM, Blogger Christine Rimmer said...

Oh, Kim. Oh, to die for. My own bathroom...

And sometimes they Overshoot. Too, too gross.

But remember--as we've all remarked so far--there's always the handiness. And the hunkiness. Oh, my...

At 2:37 PM, Blogger Christie Ridgway said...

Kim, don't get me started on toilets... But still, three-year-old boys are SO cute.

I too live in an all-male world. Our dog is a male, and I'm sure all our other pets are too, though I don't know exactly what sex the two turtles are, the tortoise, the four budgies, the two crawdads, or even the two bearded dragons. I'm sure we could find out, but trust me, I know they're males. Lots of them eat live things like crickets and worms.

'Nuff said.

At 6:37 PM, Blogger Kate Carlisle said...

I grew up with four brothers so I'm familiar with the species and their quirks!

My DH is really handy, though. He can fix anything, especially a margarita! And seriously, they're all better cooks than I am.

Kim, LOL!! A pee-free bathroom floor? Good luck with that!


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